How do you have a family with divorced parents? Also what do you tell your kids about grandma and grandpa?

My parents are divorced and its not going to be the same as im used to around the holidays. No more family activities such as putting up lights and the tree or baking cookies? When i have kids what am i supposed to tell them? That grandma and grandpa are not together and they each have their own place and someone else they love?How do you have a family with divorced parents? Also what do you tell your kids about grandma and grandpa?
My parents are divorced. My dad lives out of state and my mom is just a couple of hours away. My daughter is 6 years old and knowing that my parents aren't together has never really been a big issue. When she asked, I told her that my dad lives in Tennessee. It is too far for him to come visit us. She has never questioned why grandma isn't married to him. But she has questioned why people get divorced, and I told her that sometimes people realize that they don't love each other the right way to be married. When that happens - they get a divorce. It usually ends up with them being happier than they would be if they were fighting all the time, and it gives them the chance to find someone they can be in love with. ... This rule applies to grandparents too. Durring a talk similar to this is also a good time to mention that divorce is still sad though, and that is why it is important to make sure you found the right person before getting married. (and if they are old enough, you could change it to ';before having sex or getting married';)





You are right. It won't be the same when you do activities such as putting up a tree and baking cookies. But you can still create good memories between your kids and your parents. When the holidays are here, the most important thing to me is that I make sure my daughter and I enjoy the preparations together. If my mom gets to come help, even better. If not, we invite over friends, neighbors, or other relatives. And last year my daughter and I got ready for Christmas by ourselves. It was still a special time.





You can save a few activities for each parent. Like you could have the kids bake cookies put up a tree. The other could go out with y'all to ride a train or find a wagon ride to go see Christmas lights. ... There are plenty of things to choose from. They could even just cuddle up with a book or movie and a cup of hot chocolate.





Don't worry. It will be ok. Even the cloud of divorce has its silver lining. And kids adjust well to this kind of stuff. Especially when they are raised with it just being the way things are.How do you have a family with divorced parents? Also what do you tell your kids about grandma and grandpa?
In my case my mother passed away before my daughter was born.......





my parents were divorced when I was 3 and my father is remarried.


My 5 year old daughter knows that ';Grandpa'; is mummy`s father and that mummy`s mother died (she has visited the grave). ';Nana'; is not mummy`s mother but she is Auntie .........`s mummy (my step-sister)





I never really explained about divorce in our case.....and it doesn`t seem to be a problem. Actually the bad feelings I have for my step-mother don`t apply when it comes to my daughter. She may not be my mother, but she is certainly my daughters grandmother.





Once you have your own children, YOU are in charge of making traditions (which is so much fun!!) You can take what you liked from growing up and add others as you go.


I am sure you feel so sad about the loss of the family and family traditions you knew - but your child will not feel that. If everyone behaves well, you will have 3 sets of loving grandparents (I believe you should give the step-parents the grandparent title, even if you don`t give the parent title)



Just because your parents are divorced doesnt mean that you cant have those things that you love about holidays .. the lights, the cookies. It may not be exactly the same but you can still do them with your mom and with your dad. You cant change anything .. it is what it is .. so just enjoy those things that you've always enjoyed.


When you're a parent someday .. tell your kids the truth .. that grandma and grandpa loved each other but werent able to make it together. It stinks that you'll have to make choices about where to go etc. but, again, you cant change it. All you can do is make the most of what you do have. I was angry and hurt for a long time after my parents. I always felt i had to choose one over the other when it came to holidays . and that felt unfair. But .. eventually you just have to let it go. I came to just be glad that i had both of my parents .. even if they werent together.


Good luck ...
You tell them the truth.